Cell Phones Don't Give You Cancer After All
The warnings of "cell phone will kill you!" were at one point, widespread. It seems like only yesterday we were reading quotes like this, from Doctor Keith Black, the chairman of neurology at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles: "What microwave radiation does in most simplistic terms is similar to what happens to food in microwaves, essentially cooking the brain. So in addition to leading to a development of cancer and tumors, there could be a whole host of other effects like cognitive memory function, since the memory temporal lobes are where we hold our cell phones."
Our fantastic smartphones were cooking our brains, giving us cancer and tumors and zapping us of memories of our loved ones. If that wasn't bad enough, the children — dear god, our future! — were feeling the cell phone attack the most. "Children's skulls and scalps are thinner," Black explained to CNN. "So the radiation can penetrate deeper into the brain of children and young adults. Their cells are at a dividing faster rate, so the impact of radiation can be much larger."
The news was scary, and almost frightening enough to make us consider giving up our iPhones and Androids forever. We thought "I can look up who created the amazing "Chip and Dale: Rescue Rangers" show in under thirty seconds while cooking my brain like an egg, or give up my phone and be healthy and sad." It was one of the most torturous times of our lives.
Well guess what? A study says that cell phones are fine. Yes, all those scary articles didn't hold up when tested, and there is no link between health and mobile phones. The research was the largest of its kind. A group of experts reviewed thousands of studies that claimed cell phones were killing us from 2003 through 2011. What they found was that there was never enough evidence to say that our tiny phones were destroying us all.
"There are still limitations to the published research that preclude a definitive judgement, but the evidence overall has not demonstrated any adverse effects on human health from exposure to radiofrequency fields below internationally accepted guideline levels," Professor Anthony Swerdlow, one of the people part of the study, told The Guardian.
The experts did say that this was only based on 15 years of cell phone usage, so beyond that they couldn't be sure, but for now, all is well. "The general public should be reassured by the conclusions on mobile phone use as the current evidence does not support any causal link to brain tumours or other cancers," added another professor taking part in the research.
We understand that debunking many studies with one study is kind of foolish, but the alternative is too much for us to bear. Researching obscure cartoons from the early 90's wherever we are is worth a little burnt brain cells, dammit.
[Pic via Flickr - MediaiteJack]
